"The best mirror is an old friend."
- George Herbert 

 Very interesting quote.  In order to be a friend we have to first like ourselves.  Much of our self-esteem and self-concept is derived from what we interpret or perceive others think of us.  Cooley called this the Looking Glass Self.  Check out the video below and see how this concept works.


http://youtu.be/T2YLAYCJvyk

What do you think?  Do we really base our perception of ourselves on the perception of others?

I have been thinking lately about the use of Social Media and our interpersonal relationships.  The vocabluary we use is interesting.  When we select to include someone on our social media site we "be-friend them."  This means that we have decided that they fit our criteria for a friend and we feel we have a shared meaning in our relationship.  Or does it?  One reason we choose to be friends with someone is that we feel that we have some similarities.  Perhaps we like the same activites, or music or display some of the same values and beliefs.  But what happens when we "be-friend" a friend of a friend?  Do we really have something in common with them? 

The Law of Attraction states that we are attracted to someone if they hold similar attitudes and beliefs as we hold.  Because of this similarity we find them more attractive and then we feel that we would like to get to know them better.  The Propinquity effect says that meeting and interacting with others increases the chance that friendship will develop.  If we meet another person's friends and spend time with them the likelihood of our developing a friendship with them will increase.  Now here is the catch.  We "be-friended" our friend's friend on our social network.  We personally may not have any contact with them at all in person.  We possibly may not even know what they look like.  Can we really become friends simply over social media?

Mere Exposure Theory tells us that the more we are exposed to someone and spend time with them over and over again, they more likely we will form a positive impression of them and then we can become friends.  So in this situation, do we really have a new friend?  With no face to face interaction and no development of shared interests, what doe this "be-friend" thing actually mean?  Perhaps it simply means we acknowledge them in the virtual world.  Who knows?  Maybe the problem here lies in our definition, or lack of definition, of the term friendship. 

Oh, and now that I have "be-friended" you I think that maybe this friendship just isn't working out and I am going to "de-friend" you now.  Next we will have to determine what it means to be "de-friended." 

Who knows??????????!

What do you think?